My failed attempt at socializing Millie.

Recently it has become a mission of mine to make sure that Millie plays with other children her age, well consider me the Titanic of socialization.

Attempt number one occurred on a Saturday when we decided to go to cartwheels and coffee www.cartwheelsandcoffee.com It looked like it could be fun and being on Cary Street there were bound to be young, "hip" parents there. We get there and there are two kids there which am thinking is good because it won't be overwhelming for Millie. We go to pay and turn around and both sets of parents are packing there kids up to leave.

Umm do we smell? Is my child hideous? WTF!

So we stay and play for an hour and no other kids come in. Ok so it may have been around noon (a typical kids nap time) and it was kind of warm out but I thought for sure there would be other kids. I also didn't realize that it is affiliated with a church until I started looking around and noticed that they had daycare during church over at the Byrd and saw this

I kid they didn't really have that sign hanging up in there so we will try it again on a crappy day when kids are sure to be there.

Well I was so gung ho about having Millie play we went to the CTC (Chesterfield Town Center for those no in the know)and go to their little kid play area. We make it over there and it's not very crowded maybe 5 kids so I think Millie can do this. It starts out fine we go in and she heads for some spinning toy and she is content to spin these blocks with pictures on them for about 5 minutes. Then out of nowhere this girl (who for the rest of this tale I will refer to as Snotasauraus Rex)comes over to say hi to Millie. Millie just looks at her because 1) she is shy 2) this kid is freaky looking with snot all over her face and 3) she has the look of pure evil in her eyes

Snotasauraus Rex says hi and then proceeds to tackle Millie pulling her to the ground. Millie loses her shit crying instantaneously and I do to trying to pry her off. The person "watching" her I can only conclude is her older teenage sister who is busy messing with her giant Real Housewives of Orange County looking earring and does nothing. I grab Millie and have to hold her for 10 minutes before she will get down. We try again it's fine for 2 minutes before Snotasauraus Rex comes over again and this time brings along her brother who is like the dinosaur that can spit stuff because he has snot and spit coming out of him and is getting it all over the place. Again she tries to attack Millie and I get in her way and knock her down like a linebacker.

Just kidding I do get in the way but do not knock her over. Her mother is back from wherever she came from (i think it's hell)and apologizes for Snotasauraus Rex saying she is the youngest of five kids and plays rough. I say it's fine because it is and I know that I am kind of overreacting because I haven't had Millie around too many other kids her age and Snotasauraus Rex is a kid and kids play. I am so going to be overprotective, I can't help it I am a control freak. Well what I couldn't control even with hand sanitizer liberally applied after "playing" was the sickness that has consumed my precious Millie Willie.

Millie has been sick for six days with high fevers, a rash and double ear infections. It has been the scariest thing ever, mainly because the fever and not knowing how to help her feel better.

We took her to the doctor on Wednesday and they said everything looked ok and to just give her Motrin. Well by Friday she still had a fever and now had a rash all over her torso and head, we call them and they say if she still has a fever the next day bring her in. Next day she still has a fever so we go to the doctor's where they proceed to tell us she has a double ear infection and they don't know what the rash is. They give us an antibiotic and tell us if by Monday the fever hasn't gone away she needs to come in for blood work. Holy Shit tell me why the frick she would need blood work and that nothing is wrong with her. Luckily today (Sunday)she woke up with no fever and the rash is going away. So I am being optimistic (against my nature I know)that everything will be ok and that Snotasauraus Rex didn't get the best of Millie just my heartstrings.

Being a parent may be the scariest, hardest and freakiest thing I've ever done but so far it's been the most rewarding.

Millie in a Dress with bo bo fake Ugg boots, I call them Fugs.

The Souchuns come thru again.

Yeah for Christmas time and beverages and FurReal.

Latte the devil dog that humps my mom's arm all the time.

Happy Holidays!

Aww her first baby doll.

Christmas did not go as expected.

For Millie’s big present we got her an indoor inflatable bouncer. Words can not describe how stoked Chip and I were to give this to her. Since the day it was delivered I had to restrain myself from opening it early and letting her get her bounce on but I prevailed over my inner child and waited til Christmas. First off once we opened it on Christmas and took it outside to start blowing it up Chip realized that he didn’t have the right adapter for the compressor we had so a few calls later we learned that his mother did and she said she would bring it over later when she came for brunch. We couldn’t wait so chip went and got it. So he got home and started blowing it up with Gramber (Greg & Amber) and my mom while I kept Millie occupied in the other room. Once it was blown up we let Millie walk into the room to discover it. Well as she walked into the room and saw the monstrosity she burst out into tears and not just little tears but full on bloody murder tears. (Much like her birthday) We tried to put her in it and you would have thought it was full of flames, snakes , broccoli or some other horrible awful thing the way she was trying to get away from it. For the rest of the day she stayed away from it like the plague and I was so bummed out b/c I was sure she would love it, goes to show you how well I know my child huh? Well don’t worry it wasn’t money down the tubes b/c the next day she got in it and loved it, she just gets in it and bounces her heart out and if I tell her to get in her house she will go in it just like the dogs…

The rest of Christmas was great, we had brunch at 2 and everyone came over and ate all the food that Chip and Kelly had made. We had a lot of food baked oatmeal, hashbrown casserole, grandpa’s special stuffing (mozzarella, prosciutto, pepperoni and garlic bread) ham, carrots and our traditional eggrolls that a friend of chip’s mother makes every year and gives us some as well and they are good! I wish I had taken a picture of the spread b/c it was a sight to say the least. Mille ate lots of oatmeal and the casseroles.

Millie got way too much stuff so it was good that Chip and I decided only to get her a few things. She was very fond of the creepy baby doll and stroller that Gramber got her, her fake cat we call FurReal b/c it meows at her and blinks (it’s creepy) and the book the Souchuns gave about a cat and sprinkles that I am already sick of reading. I think the best part was having everyone around b/c Millie loves having an audience and she had so many people to choose from who could follow her around watching her walk and point at the Christmas tree and the ornaments.

Next year should be interesting b/c she should have some concept of Santa and that she’s going to get stuff vs. this year where she just wanted to rip up the paper and sit in the boxes. Not that what it is all about but really who doesn’t like a present?

In other Millie related news she is a walking champ which makes going out in public a little bit more difficult b/c she want’s to walk everywhere and that isn’t always feasible and I am not going to put her on a leash that just seems cruel. She has more teeth coming in which has made her a little grumpier than usual but it’s a molar and that has got to hurt. Her total teeth count is up to 9 and they are kinda funky looking. One of the bottom ones is coming in behind the other two. I am betting that she will have the Cooke gap. I just hope this isn’t a glimpse of what her real teeth will look like b/c they be funky… We are debating putting her in daycare once a week b/c she needs to be around other children so she doesn’t become the kid who doesn’t share (AKA The Brat) I am really scared of her just getting sick all the time. We shall see.

Millie has also decided that she doesn’t give kisses anymore she will only blow you a kiss and she equates that to meaning goodbye however she will greet you with a wave and a very high pitched hi! Other words in her vocabulary are mama, dada, ball and woof woof. Chip says he taught her to meow but I have yet to hear that so I don’t believe it. When you ask her what a lion says she will say rowr while moving her hand in a clawing motion which is really funny.